Every external control, even internalized external control—”you should”—interferes with the healthy working of the organism. There is only one thing that should control: the situation. If you understand the situation you are in and let the situation you are in control your actions, then you learn to cope with life.1
The less confident we are in ourselves, the less we are in touch with ourselves and the world, the more we want to control.2
… most of our role-playing is designed to use up lot of … energy for controlling …3
Please, note that the real opposites are impotence vs. control madness. If you feel you have to control everything immediately you feel impotent.4
1 Frederick S. Perls, Gestalt Therapy Verbatim, (Bantam Books, 1969), p. 20.
2 Ibid., p. 21.
3 Ibid., p. 61.
4 Ibid., p. 230.